There are moments I have very strong emotional reactions to things, as we all do. I dwell and dwell on things that are somewhat simple and understandable.
I like talking to people, but that’s because I get a general understanding of what I’m saying better.
I have been struggling with the idea of compassion. I don’t even know how we all have it, but somehow we seem to not apply it evenly.
Think about this: a man is in prison for possessing drugs and using them. Not selling — using. Normal people would say, yeah, he probably deserved to get locked up. He did something bad, therefore, he deserves something bad.
And I do understand that frame of thought. I understand that mindset. It makes sense — even I think that too, at times. But you read about their early life, and you find out their mother was doing drugs before they were born. No stable home life. They had to take care of themselves. They would starve some days without food. Abused by their parents. Think of everything different to your life — that’s what that person went through. It may be a strange thing to say, but given all that, it is somewhat expected that they would go into a life of crime.
Imagine your life without supportive parents, friends or family, or if you had not been born in a stable country and raised within a strong moral framework. You did not choose these advantages; they were shaped by people and circumstances that came before you. Even our character and capacity for moral decision-making are substantially influenced by factors beyond our control. Yet we still congratulate ourselves for being able to say, “If that were me, I would do this.” But it is not you. It is not me.
But if you understand that your life is not entirely yours, you can understand why the person in prison for these drug-related crimes deserves compassion. Yes, I said it, and I mean it. They deserve your compassion and understanding. No one is saying accept it. No one is saying support it. But understand it.
Because once we understand each other, we make great change.
Society is better overall when we are kinder to our most vulnerable. Maybe I am naive in thinking so largely about the first step, because the second step we will not like as much. The second step requires active understanding and helping. But it also requires fortification — a strong sense of self, if you will.
It does not escape me that not all of us can help others as much as they need to be helped. But if I can reach a cupboard that my little brother cannot reach, I ought to give him snacks from it when he wants some — or better, not put the snacks somewhere he can’t reach in the first place.